(originally published in 2019)

Hi guys!

How are you?! I’ve been great – dreaming up and researching my next adventure, becoming a therapist!

After I started this series, BECOMING Joyful from the inside out, I realized I emails were nice, but are just scratching the surface of how I want to be OF SERVICE.

I’ll give it to you in the tiniest nugget I can.

When I started as a writer I looked around and saw all sorts of female role models, Jen Hatmaker, Glennon Doyle, Elizabeth Gilbert – and I put myself on their track without much thought. Writing, speaking, ever onward and upward – and after The Courage to Become and after TEDx and after spending some quiet time in Panama I realized – I DON’T WANT TO PAY THE PRICE (I perceive) THEY PAID. I’m not willing to be on social media ever more. I’m not willing to leave my family to fly a ton to speaking events. I’m not willing to build an empire. I still love all those ladies, it’s just not what I want anymore.

So I sat and thought about what I really wanted, and after peeling back the layers I landed on – therapist. I want to be a therapist, face-to-face.

I do some one-on-one coaching now, which I adore. I love my clients and love the space we create together, but I want to be better equipped. And so I’m going back to school next year! I will get a Master’s in Professional Counseling and I will be licensed to work with people of all ages, couples and families. I’m thrilled about it.
Thank you for being part of the unfolding of my dreams.

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Let’s get back to BECOMING JOYFUL!

Nutrition has been a huge part of my journey.

Let’s define nutrition for this email as – what we eat and drink.

Food for me is social. I like to break bread with people, toast to celebrations, share a piece of cake. I like interacting with people over food and wine. It makes me feel good and connected and like we are sharing a moment.

Foods that make me happy and incite feelings of joy and comfort are – cake, pizza, chips and salsa, ice cream, hamburgers, tacos – all the things I used to eat as a kid. Food was the centerpiece of my day then and kind of is now.

And my journey with nutrition has been an unfolding and examining of – why I eat what I eat.

I started dieting an taking amphetamines in my mid 20’s, and have done cleanses, Atkins, Weight Watchers – the whole shabang. When I was 29 I learned I was allergic to gluten and I thought OH NO! Life will be impossible without gluten!!!! I was so overwhelmed. And then over the next few years, I learned how to eat without gluten. And the path as continued. Year after year, refining what I eat and why I eat it.

Am I cured of social eating? NO. Have I washed away all those associations? NO. Those are woven deep into my neuropathways but one day, I know I will only eat and drink things that are nourishing to my mind and body.

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When Luciana was a few months old and I realized I had PPD for the 2nd time I sought out information that would help me heal. I wanted to do my best to heal naturally, without meds and someone suggested a book titled, Woman Code. The book gave me ideas on how to regulate my hormones. A nugget I learned was that SUGAR, ESPECIALLY AT NIGHT, throws hormones out of whack.

I mean, I was eating a sweet treat and having a glass of wine EVERY NIGHT.

I was contributing to my PPD? It wasn’t just a chemical imbalance?

The book taught me so much more, but that was the biggest takeaway – SUGAR IS BAD.

And there I went following the information, article by article, like a yellow brick road on the way to health.

I tried my best to heal naturally but it wasn’t enough. I ended up cycling onto ZOLOFT.

There are fervent opinions on either side of anti-depressants, and I understand them all. At the time, I was full of rage and instability and I needed help. I started Zoloft, and after finding the right dose, I felt amazing. So much better. Able to find some resilience again.

A year later, I went back to my OB/GYN and asked when I could start cycling off and she said, “You’ll probably be on it forever.” And that just didn’t feel right to me. FOREVER? Why? So I dug deep on research and learned about the GUT-BRAIN AXIS.

The gut-brain axis is "the bi-directional communication between the entric nervous system an the emotional/cognitive centers of the brain." The brain and gut talk to each other. If my gut is healthy, my brain will respond? OH.

The more I learned to more I realized I could heal myself and I was ready to commit to doing the work.

So last June, I began to eat to nourish my body and after I felt I had built a good base, I started weaning myself off Zoloft. Month by month, I moved the needle forward – better nutrition, better supplements, cleansing my liver and less Zoloft. I moved in tiny increments. And every time I cut my dosage, I had withdrawals. I would get dizzy, feel brain “zaps,” all sorts of weird side effects. But I am happy to report that I am officially medication free!

We have control over what we eat, and SO we have control over how we think and how we feel.

If we feed our bodies wholesome, nourishing food, our brains will reward us with peace and joy and good our body will reward us with vitality.

The initial reaction is usually to ask, “Can I still eat _____________?” “Can I still drink______________________?” The answer is, Yes. Yes, you can. But you will keep feeling how you have always felt.

Gut health is the beginning point for treatment of depression, anxiety and many other mental health issues.

Here are some amazing leaders in this space if you’re ready to dig deeper.

Dr. Nicole Le Pera
Dr. Kelly Brogan

“Eating well is a demonstration of self worth” – Dr. Nicole Le Pera